Open Letter to Neil Young

Dear Neil,

I hate to say it, but you’re just another greedy hippie. Yesterday I tried to place most of the blame on your overpriced tickets on the concert promoter, but as I reflected, there’s nobody to blame but you. When you’re the headliner of a show that charges $257 for tickets (and tickets that are 100 feet away from the stage) you’re setting expectations incredibly high. I have a feeling that you despise a lot of your fans (and after listening to them drunkenly shout at you between songs and watching them play air guitar all night long, I can understand why) but that’s no reason to take it out on the rest of us.

I’m willing to bet that you and I had the same reaction when we walked into the Nokia Theatre LA Live (or whatever it’s called). From the giant corporate logo on the side of the building, to the bombardment of the senses from the giant TV screens outside and in, to the new carpet smell (oddly mixed with some weird shit/barf smell), the place ain’t got no soul. It’s basically a 7,000 capacity, cold warehouse with corporate boxes and cramped seats. The big selling points from the developers are the state of the art sound, the fact (?) that no seat is more than a couple of hundred feet from the stage and the giant TV screens next to the stage. But when you saw those TV screens you probably went apeshit. “If the fans want to watch me on TV they can rent one of my fucking DVDs,” I imagine you said (or thought). So, for better or worse, those TV screens were dark last night.

And your performance? Starting off with the acoustic set and then having an intermission before the electric part was a good idea. “From Hank to Hendrix” isn’t my favorite song off of Harvest Moon, but a decent kicking off point (your fans cheering and applauding throughout the song was distracting, but not your fault). “Ambulance Blues” = great choice. I never thought I’d hear it. “Sad Movies” = interesting and obscure, but maybe a non-essential choice. The story about the Norwegians from the cover band was fun. “A Man Needs a Maid” sent a couple of chills up my spine when you started. The lyrics have always felt a little misogynistic, but it’s also autobiographical and honest and a classic. People were chuckling around me when you switched over to that organ to simulate the overblown strings. “No One Seems to Know” = good obscure choice. “Harvest” = great choice. It was another one that gave me some chills when it started. “Campaigner” = ok choice. Substituting George Bush for Richard Nixon (and the crowd’s reaction) was pretty obvious. “After the Gold Rush” = great choice. The old dork behind me who tried to clap and couldn’t keep time distracted me the whole time, so I didn’t get chills. “Mellow My Mind” = good choice. “Love Art Blues” = another good obscure choice that I didn’t think I’d hear. “Love Is a Rose” = good choice. And that concluded your acoustic set. It was an interesting and obscure set list that I can get behind. Unfortunately your fans distracted me and took me out of the moment during most of the songs.

I’ve never seen you electric, so I was excited but apprehensive for the second half of the show. Coming out of the gates with “The Loner” was a great choice. It’s one of my favorite early songs. When you followed it up with “Everybody Knows This is Nowhere” I was preparing to be blown away. But then you played “Dirty Old Man.” It’s kinda fun in spirit, but wouldn’t make a list of my top 100 Neil Young songs. And then you played “Spirit Road.” Bleh. When you followed it up with “Bad Fog of Loneliness” I thought we were back in business. And then “Winterlong” = great choice. I was happy with “Oh, Lonesome Me” too. “The Believer” is another OK song from the new album. Whatever. But then you lost me for good when you stretched out and jammed on “No Hidden Path” for about 25 minutes. Why Neil? If you wanna jam, pick a classic. Then you left the stage and the first song of your encore was “Cinnamon Girl.” It’s a classic and a crowd pleaser. Fine. And then you ended with “Tonight’s the Night” and finally lashed out. “If Bruce Berry was here he would have fixed this fucking speaker by now.” All in all it was a pretty good show, but not worth the cash. I would have walked away happy if the tickets had been $200 cheaper (each). I won’t be going back on Friday.

By the way, we missed your wife’s set. The line to get beer was so slow moving that it took over a half hour to get through it. We let some dude cut in front of us at the front because he offered to buy us whatever we wanted (2 Buds for $12.50 and a champagne for $12.50). At least that made me feel better about paying $25 to park. As for the “state of the art sound?” There was a distracting surround sound effect and I kept hearing the high end (mostly the high-hat) over my right shoulder. And there was an annoying buzz in the front speaker for more than a couple of the acoustic numbers. For your fans who are used to seeing shows at the Staples or Forum, it was probably an improvement over that.

Your fan,
Duke

P.S. In case you’re kicking back in your pickup getting high and thinking to yourself, “I wonder what Duke would like hear” I’ve got some ideas (granted, you’ve worn a few of these out): “Lookin’ For a Love,” “Birds,” “See the Sky About to Rain,” “Cowgirl in the Sand,” “Helpless,” “Tell Me Why,” “Only Love Can Break Your Heart,” “Are You Ready for The Country, “Old Man,” “The Needle and the Damage Done,” “On the Beach,” “Roll Another Number (for the Road),” “Danger Bird,” “Cortez the Killer” or “Like a Hurricane” (to jam on), “Long May You Run,” “Hold Back the Tears,” “Will to Love,” “Peace of Mind,” “Already One,” “Comes a Time,” “Pocahontas,” “Unknown Legend,” “You and Me,” “Harvest Moon,” “Old King,” “Good to See You,” “Daddy Went Walkin’,” “This Old Guitar.”

P.P.S. I still love you.